Go, Now, Go!

I've had this whole week off from work, and because my bosses planned their trip at the last minute I decided against throwing together a last minute trip somewhere. Instead I've just been a total homebody - playing games, reading, and doing a few small projects to fully settle in to the new apartment. And finally watching My So-Called Life, which I purchased a while back.

I loved this show when I was 16. *Loved* it. I watched it right from the start, even though it was on opposite Mad About You (which was one of my favorite shows) and Friends (which was just starting, but I was interested in it). I would tape My So-Called Life intending to watch it later, but would flip to it during the first commercial break of Mad About You and never make it back. I completely identified with Angela, her introspection, and her lust for Jordan Catalano*. Watching it again has given me the strangest sense of deja vu, because I not only remember what my favorite scenes were, or what lines resonated with me as a teenager, but I seem to be responding to it in exactly the same way I did at 16. (I'm not necessarily saying this proudly.) I'm compelled to rewatch the same scenes I did then (namely those involving Jordan, even though I've had no interest in Jared Leto's career post-MSCL), and paying little attention to the episodes that didn't grab me at the time. I don't find myself wishing from an adult perspective that Angela would notice Brian, the way my mother did when she and I would watch it together. Nope, I want the adolescent dream of the emotionally unavailable bad boy turning into The One to come true.

At least this time around I know how the most painful, cringeworthy scenes turn out, so I don't have to suffer through them all over again.

*Seriously. Pretty eyes have always been my weakness, and I don't think they come any prettier than this:
Sigh.